Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Castles in the Sky

Do you ever questioned your life?

I do at least five times a day. Am I doing the right thing? Is this what I really want to do? Do I really want to end up doing this? Am I HAPPY? And finally...I can start to answer yes to these questions. It feels amazing! After I met with my adviser, a lot of things cleared up in my life. I'm staying in school, going to study abroad in Japan, and work towards my goal in being an International Accountant. I know it's not what I had originally planned when I first started going through majors a few years ago, but this just seems right for me. I don't know how else to explain.

Do you ever wonder why?

I do wonder why. I wonder what could have happened if something small in my life had changed. Or even something big that could have changed. What would my life be like if I chose to go to a different school? What would my life be like if I hadn't moved out? All these questions are running through my head and they always seem to pop out in the shower. I'm not sure, but I assume it has something to do with I don't really have to think all that much to take a shower. It's pretty much subconscious's time when It's shower time. I just thought that it was very interesting that I do wonder why...and it made my think why do I wonder why? Now that is the real question...and one I'm not sure how to answer.

Do you ever see in your dreams, All the castles in the sky?

My dreams are very interesting. Most of my dreams that I remember happen in the future. They're set in a time when I'm not in college anymore. Sometimes I'm in Japan, other times I'm still here in the United States. I don't want to dwell too much on them though, because I would want bits and pieces of these dreams to come true. I know I should try to reach my dreams...but that is the other kind of dream. Yes, I would love to follow the dreams I have at night, but then my life probably wouldn't be how I would want it to be. It would be really sad I think. I don't know. Tomorrow and twelve years in the future all hold the same place in that I never know what is going to happen. Yes, I can say that about today as well because it's nine o'clock in the morning so this afternoon is in the near future. But on the other hand, I have my day pretty much whatever.

I was listening to a song called Castles in the Sky by Ian Van Dahl feat. Marsha. I'll put the link up so you can listen to it. The questions above that got me thinking are the first few lines of the song. This song is really good and I like it when I hear a song that actually makes me want to sit and contemplate my life. Well that's all since I have to get ready for class now! Talk to you all later!

Love, Stasi

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