Thursday, December 17, 2009

Updates Out The Wa-Zoo!

Hisashiburi desu ne! So it's been quite a long while since I've updated! Bad me. *wacks self * Anyways, a lot has happened since I've last posted. The biggest and best part is that I was accepted to study abroad in Japan!! I'll be leaving in late March! I can't wait. I'm really excited and nervous all at the same time. This will be my first time leaving the United States and only my third time on an airplane (The first and second was to and from my aunt's wedding in San Diego the summer after 8th grade). Right now, the most stressful thing is money. My mom finally got a job about a month ago though, so that's really exciting! At least she has some sort of income now, although she's getting less than she was on unemployment. On the plus side, I'll have good insurance again and won't have to have UNC's way too expensive insurance. But anyways, back to the whole money sucks. That's pretty much it. Back to the more exciting topic of Japan, I'll start a new blog under this account that'll be specifically for my travels and life in Japan. As of right now I'm also planning on doing an accompanying Vlog, but I might not get to that, so there'll just be random video postings. We'll see how things go when I get there! The first part is a home stay so I'm REALLY excited about that! I'll try to keep updating until I leave, then everything will probably switch to the other blog. XD

As for anime, I haven't really watched many lately. I saw a few episodes of series I've seen at the beginning of the semester at Anime Club, but then I got busy and couldn't really attend anymore. A lot of other people were busy as well, so the club kind of got put on hold. I have been more into Dramas lately, especially Korean ones. This might be me planning on doing too many things again, but I was considering doing another blog under this same account for drama reviews and updates and such! We'll see. At the very least I'd want to place my list somewhere online for reference. I was looking at some of the sites that are similar to but I haven't found one that I really enjoyed. Right now I have it all in an Excel spreadsheet. Maybe I'll mess around with some of the free website programs around.

What else is there to update? Oh! Skip Beat! Chapter 150 came out this morning, so I just have to wait for it to be subbed. The last chapter was absolutely amazing!! I was fangirlling and squirming in my chair and most likely was smiling like a goof. Um...I can't remember when I last updated, but the we are still on the Valentine's arc. sum it up, Sho got jealous of Kyoko not being angry and focusing on her revenge anymore. He brought her flowers and put a piece of expensive chocolate in her mouth. When she wasn't expecting it, he kissed her and "took the chocolate back." As a result Kyoko's first kiss was stolen and hating Sho came right back to the forefront of her mind. Ren tried to calm her down by having her think that it was professional and that if she does, then she doesn't have to count it as a real kiss. She tries, but of course she can't help but brood when having down time. To distract her, Ren kisses her on the cheek (and assume fangirl mode) and thanks her for his birthday present. The last chapter (149) started out with Kyoko being consumed by the kiss from Sho and talking about how he has taken over her body with hatred. At the end, she was confused and consumed by the kiss from Ren; taken over in a completely different way. It was really nice to see Ren finally do something, and I can't wait to see how Kyoko is going to figure this out. After Ren kissed her cheek, Kyoko couldn't even film her Mio scenes. I can't wait to see how she interprets everything and if she finally comes to realize that Ren has feelings for her and she for him. Oh, but then again I could be hoping for too much in one chapter. Before all this kissing stuff happened, this arc was getting a little drawn out. I'm just happy that things are picking back up into what made me love Skip Beat! in the first place. Oh and Yashiro has a wonderful scene with Ren in this past chapter. I wish he would have more parts! Yashiro for the win!! XD

Arashi update!! In early September I got the 10 year anniversary limited edition 3 Disc compilation CDs, All the Best! 1999-2009! It's absolutely amazing. I just wish I could go to Japan to see the tour. I'm finally getting closer to being caught up on Arashi no Shukudai-kun. Only 40-something episodes left. I've seen a bunch of piece of episode 162 and can't wait to watch the whole thing! They have their new Christmas photo shoot out and the amazing ll13jl made wallpapers and icons out of them! Check them out here: I have the first few episodes of Aiba-chan's first leading role in a Drama, My Girl, but I haven't watched it yet. I know that it has a lot of drama and that a lot of people cried, and lately I've been in a more comedic mood. For example, I've watched the amazing Korean Drama You're Beautiful about three times through now. The last couple episodes have a more depressing and mellow mood, but the show overall is amazing. But anyway, back to Arashi. Their new single My Girl came out. It has two other songs on it. Tokei Jikake no Umbrella is one and it is the theme song for the mini drama 0 Gōshitsu no Kyaku (Guest in Room 0), which stars a lot of J&E boys. Riida is in the first couple episodes. I really like this song and it is pretty different for the tone and style of most of Arashi's songs. The other song is Super Fresh. It's pretty good as well, but then again I haven't found an Arashi song I didn't like. They also had a song released with their 5x10 All the Best! Clips 1999-2009 DVD that has all of their PVs and special introductions for each. The song is called Attack It! and it is one of my favorite Arashi songs! It was a little odd at first hearing them all rap, but the entire song is full of so much energy and it just amazing! Let's see, is there anything else to update about my fangirlism, oh well my list has rearranged. I was reading about the boys and just watching their various interviews and variety shows and have come to realize that I really like Sakurai Sho. Before he was just king of there, but I've been learning a lot more about him and I've come to like him as a person even more. There are things he says and does that just makes me take pause and improve my impressions of him!

As for other fangirlisms, I've been listening to a lot of FT Island lately as well. The lead vocal Lee Hong Ki was Jeremy in You're Beautiful and sang some of the insert songs. I found their CDs and started listening and I still can't figure out why I just passed over them earlier. Right now my current favorite song from them is "Bad Woman." The music video is really nice and Hong Ki just belts out the chorus. It just sits right with me and the mood I've been in lately. I've also been listening to abingdon boys school a lot as well. My current favorite song that I've been listening to a lot from them is NERVOUS BREAKDOWN. Of course, I've also been listening to both of the You're Beautiful OSTs. And all of this Japanese and Korean music has been in between spurts of Christmas Music! XD

Speaking of Christmas, most of my presents are bought and taken care of. I just have to get my dad's (although I know exactly what I'm going to get him) and finish making my Favorite Grandpa's! I also need to start digging out my address book so I can send my Christmas Cards here soon. I already have them all bought, I just need to find addresses and put stamps and names on the envelopes!

Well, I think I have run out of things to update. I should be getting my NDK New Year's Eve cosplay gown and wig soon! That'll be a lot of fun. I'll definitely update after Christmas and after NYE. I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year (just in case I don't get back on before either holiday XD)!!

~Ja Mata
Stasi <3

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Get these Mother Fucking Afros off these Mother Fucking Samurai!!

So I'm finally updating again!! I think I'm going to start updating once or twice a month. So I'm getting pretty busy and it will only get worse because things are coming to a close in this pretty busy semester. So first off I'll start with school stuff! I'm getting close to finishing my college research paper. It's about the otaku culture and the positives affects it has on the Japanese culture as a whole. It's really interesting and I'm enjoying researching this because I love Japan!! Also, if you couldn't tell, I like the otaku culture and would be known to be a part of the "American" otaku culture. But anyway, my conference went really well with my professor and so I'm pretty confident in passing the class with an A- possibly an A. Yeah it's lame that she uses the plus minus system. My microeconomic class is going to kill me. We have a test coming up this Monday which we just found out and our Libbys are due next Wednesday. And as per usual, I was procrastinating and totally have only like a third of my libby done. So that'll be a lot of fun catching up on that. As for my other classes, Accounting is going really well. Of course, that is my major! On the most recent quiz I got 100% so that was really exciting. In Japanese, I got 100% on my test again. This time I got my grade from the extra credit I did. On the previous chapter test, I got the same grade but without any extra credit. So overall I'm pretty confident in passing most of my classes with A's. I could possibly have a B in my International Business class, it just depends on how I do on my last test.

Continuing with school, I submitted my study abroad application for Japan earlier today!! I'm really excited and can't wait to find out when and what and everything I possibly can. I am sooo stoked to go to Japan for a few months and go on excursions and just chill and hang out in one of my favorite places!! Hopefully I'll find out soonish if I get to officially get to go!!

Speaking of Japan, Stasi's Anime and Manga update!! So the recent chapter in Skip Beat was pretty amazing and I'm really glad that we are getting away from the latest arc. So it's around Valentine's and Ren's Birthday. Kyoko, the loving ditz that she is forgot about Ren's Birthday. We saw Ren and he clearly is excited to see what Kyoko could possibly get him. It was a pretty good chapter. We also and how he wants Kyoko to give him chocolate on Valentine's Day. Kyoko, being as dense as usual, just retaliates against him. It made me laugh a lot. I also liked that we got to see both Kyoko's and Moko's takes on Valentine's and why they both hate it so much. So yeah, it was amazing and I love Skip Beat and can't wait for the next chapter. Anyways, on to Anime. So lately I've been getting back into Toradora! It was a really cute show I started in the fall and then it kind of got put on hold since I found a few other shows that caught my attention. Anyway I've been watching them when I eat breakfast lately and I only have one episode left. So the next update I do will have my overall thoughts on that series since I'll probably finish it this Friday!! As for other anime, I finished Soul Eater. I really need to catch up in the manga because I want to see how it's different and Dan says it's pretty much amazing. So anyway, I loved the manga. I thought it was a little corny that Maka defeated the Kishin with courage, but it makes sense. Overall I give it a 10 out of 10 and I really enjoyed it!

Speaking of Soul Eater brings me to cosplaying at NDK this September. I actually have ordered my Cooking Mama and Anemone wigs!! It's exciting and I should get them pretty soon!! I'm really excited about them and can't wait until they arrive!! Anyway, I should probably start working on patterns so that I'm not too behind after this summer. So I'm going to end up making all of my cosplays this year, which is pretty exciting. I'll also be making Jenna's Eureka cosplay since we will be going together as Eureka and Anemone (from Eureka seveN)!!

So that's all for now. If I think of anything too important soon I'll try to find the time to post it. If not, I'll just have to try to remember until I get to post again, at the least next May.

Ja Ne~

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Country Hotties and Random Ramblings

So Spring Break is over. :( I had a lot of fun visiting my Grandfather and Nakama Devon in Boulder for the first part of the week. Then I went up to my dad's house and it was really relaxing. Hot tubbing in the mountains at night is soooooo wonderful!! It was a little sad though because the was some cloud cover so we couldn't see many stars, but luckily it cleared up after a little bit. I really can't wait to go up there again and see my Dad and just revel in the peacefulness that comes with the area!!

So anime update! I finished Witch Hunter Robin!! It was pretty much amazing and I wish there was more but oh well. Tower of Druaga ~The Sword of Uruk~ has 1 episode left and it's certainly set up to have a third season. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed. I just don't like that I come to like Neeba and then he does something that makes me hate him. Next thing I knew it's for a reason that makes me like him that much more and then...BAM! he's a jerk and I hate him again. There is also one more episode left on Skip Beat! I love this show and Kyoko and am totally addicted to it. It's probably my number one show and manga and this point but it makes me laugh and feel good!! I just love everything about it. I'm a little skeptical on the recent arc in the manga and the cliffhanger that they just left everyone at. How I hate that character and now it looks like she's sticking around. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to wait a see what happens next. Oh and while I was looking up the manga online I came to a startling realization. With the current exchange rate, manga in Japan...well at least Skip Beat in less than five dollars American!! HOLY FREAKING COW!! I need to really learn Japanese as fast as possible and then I can buy them in Japanese. Wait...although since I already have read it...maybe it'll help me learn Japanese.

Kyoko talking to a few of her inner demons!!

This is Kyoko with a stolen bike! I love it when the characters are drawn with cute faces like Ren's in this snapshot!! XD

The guy Kyoko got the bike from being attacked by her little inner demons!!

GAH! Now I'm all confused and the little people in brain are running in circles trying to figure out what the hell just happened. Wait...what is that from? There was a movie or TV show that I've seen...oh Spongebob!! That's it!! OH I'm starting to have things in my head that Spongebob has...well at least I'm imagining they are there. Anyway...on to other things besides the fact that I'm coming to the realization that there TRULY is something wrong with my head.

So I've been listening to a lot of country lately. Brad Paisley of course because he is amazing!! And then Billy Currington! I have a couple of his songs from mixes that friends have given me and liked them. I was listening to my Brad Paisley radio on Pandora and they played a Billy Currington song that I haven't heard before and I really liked it. So I decided to google him! OMFG!! That man in beautiful!! I guess deep down inside I am a country girl considering that's what my favorite genre was when I was little. Hmmmmmmm...but anyway I guess my point is that he's a good looking man, a wonderful country singer, and I tend to like guys in cowboy boots and hat!! :P

Okay...So I don't know if there is anything else for me to rant or tangent about. Well...I'm sure there is but my brain hasn't processed that yet. So as I'm sitting here listening to drunk b**ches running around the UC, I have come to the realization that I feel very numb. Not as in I can't feel my body because my shoulders are a little sore, but as in my feelings are very...non-existant at this current moment. Well anyways...I'll talk to you all later my little chick-a-dees!!! XD

Stasi <3

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Catching The Dead Fish

So this morning I was woken up at 9am by the fire alarm in my dorm going off. Pretty much sucked. It was funny though because the Assistant Hall Director was trying to figure out why she hadn't heard about the drill. About 10 minutes later, three fire trucks showed up. It was really cool and I love firefighters and the aura of AMAZINGNESS they put off! So I guess it was something with one of the women's restrooms. I'm not totally sure, but I'm pretty sure that is one of the most lamest reasons for a fire EVER!
So I kind of fail since I didn't post at all during the month of February, but it's small and I was really busy. So I guess I'll start out with an update on the anime I'm watching. I started Witch Hunter Robin. I'm a little over half way through and it's really good. I think I would like to cosplay Robin if I could find a good way to do her hair. I'll have to experiment. I'm also still into Soul Eater and sad that it is ending soon, but I'm excited to see how it will all end. XD Umm...I started Tower of Druaga ~ The Aegis of Uruk. It's really good and it's like watching an RPG. I finished the first season of Higurashi No Naka Ni in anime club. It was very interesting and very bloody and gorey!! XD Manga wise, I only have one chapter left of Koukou Debut, which is probably up by now so I should check it out. I also started and finished Emma. It was really sweet and I think I'm going to watch the anime. Or at least add it to my neverending list. XD On the basis of cosplay, I have a lot of ideas, but have finally figured out what I am going to do for NDK this September. I am going to do Marie Mjölnir from Soul Eater, Anemone from Eureka seveN, and Cooking Mama!! XD

So I have been hanging out with Dan & Kevin a lot more and I love it!! XD I think that Dan and I get along really well. Kevin and Derek are pretty much twins and both sarcastic bastards (in a loving way XD). Dan and I are alike in a lot of ways so it's kind of funny. I also am getting closer to Corey. Corey is a bit rambunxious sometimes, but I love him!! One of my closest friends Kristi is leaving for Germany to study abroad. It's really sad and I'm going to miss her a lot, but I know that she is going to have a blast! Jenna is moving in with Christen, which is super exciting. I haven't seen Christen for a while plus she lives less than a block away so Jenna is going to be a lot more closer!!

Let's see, what else shall I update on? Oh, I started GMing (Game Mastering)!! It's for a Vampire Campaign but it's still a lot of fun. I actually had to split it into two seperate campaigns because so many people wanted to join!! XD I feel a little more comfortable in GMing than in playing. I am also getting excited because it's practice for my campaign that I've been planning for a while now. I have most of the story line done, well at least what I could get done on it without getting effected by character decisions. I was also able to get photoshop from Derek so I'm playing around with it to try to figure everything out. I was working on a map in Microsoft Digital Image, but Derek was nice enough to share so I can try to make the best map I can. I'm really excited about it and hope that everything turns out well!! XD Jenna also started her Zombie Campaign. We started it a couple nights ago and it was pretty much amazing and I felt like I had been blown out of the water, which
leads me to my next little rant.

I have been having really weird dreams lately. For example, the one from Tuesday night. I dreamt that I was sitting on this couch and Jenna was sitting next to me. On the couch facing ours was three people. One was this really pretty Asian boy, a girl that looked familiar but had short red and yellow hair and then some nondescript female person. I was watching the girl with crazy hair because I knew that I knew her, but I couldn't figure out who she was. There was a conversation going on, but I wasn't paying attention too much. Then the girl with the red and yellow hair got up and stood in front of Jenna. I heard her talking and I realized that it was Jen So. After she was done talking to Jenna, she went and sat down. Once I had figure out that it was Jen, I glanced at the Asian boy in the middle and we ended up staring at each other awkwardly for a while. Then I woke up. I don't really know what it was supposed to mean, but it was very odd. Yeah this morning I had a really weird dream too, but I can't really remember what happened. I remembered earlier so I could write it in my blog, but I forgot. Knowing my luck it's because I wanted to remember it. XD

Anyways, I'm going to wrap things up now. I just wanted to do an update on pretty much everything!! XD Hopefully March will be a lot better with most of my family's birthdays and Spring Break '09!! Well I will talk to you all soon!! XD


Thursday, January 22, 2009


Well, I'm like a month late but happy new year!! There have been a lot of things going on lately. I am back at school! Woooo! I love all of my classes!! My favorite class is most definitely my Accounting class. It's really nice and I enjoy it. It's my passion, love, and hopefully what I'll be doing for the greater part of my life. We have already gone over basic financial forms and now we are starting to learn how to record transactions in a journal and post them into the ledger. This class so far has been a lot of review, but it's totally different from all my other classes that are basically just review for me. So yeah, I'm a geek and I'm totally excited and I don't care because it makes me happy!! XD

I'm back at work as well. I have more hours which is nice to get paid more and such. I feel a little bad though because I only have Mondays, Wednesdays, and the weekends free. Yeah it's nice, but at the same time I can see Derek's point in that I really only have time to hang out with everyone when we are gaming. Our group usually has lunch during the week, but there are scheduling conflicts so I can't eat with everybody this semester. It's kind of sad. So I already don't see Travis hardly. I don't really see Jenna lately either because we aren't in any classes together this semester. She is also transferring after this semester so I'm sad that she's leaving but happy for her at the same time since she can be doing what she loves. As for Derek, we are in the last semester of Japanese together. It's a little bittersweet. To be in the last semester of Japanese is very exciting, but at the same time it's ending. :( I also won't have anymore classes with the friends I've made for the past two years. So first semester next year, my junior year, most of my classes will be in the business school. Spring semester next year I am hoping to be able to study abroad in Japan. Then I'll come back and only have a year left!!

I used to have this mask that I wore all the time. Since coming to college, I haven't really been able to wear it. I think it is a very good thing. Before I came to UNC I was able to separate my life. I would have three different, well I guess you could call them personalities. I would be the good student that was always smiling and got good grades and got along well with most of the teachers and principals and office personnel. At home and in band I was a little more myself. I would let go a little more than when at school, but in band I would start to show myself. I don't think I ever truly was myself unless I was by myself. Even my parents didn't know what was in my head a lot of the time. I am a very independent and self sufficient person. When I first got to UNC I tried to keep up my "charade" and wear the mask. I've come to realize that in front of some people that I still have pieces of my mask on. It was too much effort to always be wearing my mask so I ended up just taking most of it off. First semester this year I was the most comfortable with myself than I have ever been. It was nice. But this semester, subconsciously I'm putting the mask back on. I can feel myself always smiling and acting like things are fine, but they aren't. I don't really know what is going on, but I just feel like something is off.

So for gamer's guild Derek is running a Star Wars campaign and I am playing Zsadist again. He is such an amazing character and he is the most developed for me. This week on both Monday and Wednesday I completely and utterly sucked. I was second guessing myself and not sure what to do and freaking out. For some reason I was really, really nervous. In our usual after section talk, Derek mentioned that I didn't do so well. He was trying to be nice about it, I could tell, but I just totally was the worst role player ever. And I felt bad for Zsadist. It was like everything I had learned and all the progress I had made in not only role playing, but in life was being ripped out of my brain.

I know that one of the things bothering me lately is next Friday, January 30th. It's weird. I thought I was over it and moved on and was healthy, but a couple nights ago, I broke down in the shower and realized that this whole time, 3 years, I have just been acting like I have finished grieving and am doing things properly (part of the mask thing mentioned above). NOT AT ALL! I just want to be selfish. I want things to have not happened at all, or in the way they did. I still feel guilty and horrible about those two days. I just want someone to tell me it's okay and how to get rid of these feelings. I don't want to have to wear the mask, but I know that if I take it off, especially next Friday, that things won't be the same. My head is such a mess right now. I can't even straighten things out.

I've been having really weird dreams lately. Really disturbing dreams that wake me in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and fearful. I haven't been screaming, but I know that if they continue like they are then it'll get to that point. These dreams have really been giving me thoughts of my own worth in this world and my purpose in life. I don't know what either of them are. I have no idea. I wish I knew. On top of that, shower time = break down time. I feel like crap, especially in a communal bathroom, but I need to have that time. At least I tend to take showers along the late side so not many people come in hearing some person sobbing in the shower. I've also been having issues with my disease lately. It's really bothering me. I just sometimes wonder why certain things didn't work out the way I wanted them too in the past. It's weird that things have come to this again. I think part of it is the fact that my roommate is gone for the week. This way I have the chance to be alone. It's nice. I get along with Face fine, but I am definitely liking the solitary as usual.

So next year I am hoping to have my own apartment. I am hoping to get one that I won't need a roommate for, but I guess that my choices are kind of limited if I go for choices like that. I really want to have a campaign next year and to do dinner at the same time. I've worked a lot on my campaign last semester, but as usual I am second guessing myself. It doesn't matter that I really want to gm, it's just that I'm afraid of totally sucking. On the other hand though I don't really want anyone to know I have worries like that. So again I am drawing into myself. I just wish I do a system restore point on my brain. Bring my brain back to my mental state last semester and have everything be better. I guess I just need to figure out what I need to do to get everything straightened out. I was thinking of going to a therapist or support group or something, but I just feel nervous. I don't really want to talk about things. I just want to keep them hidden and be the business student that gets the good grades and gets along with the teachers and hangs out with her friends and doesn't seem to be affected by any of the small things. In truth, I do get affected by the small things, but I tend to bottle and mask so nobody knows.

So I guess I'm done with post for the night. I got a lot of things off my chest. Had my eyes get watery a couple of times, but I feel a little better. Like maybe 1.5%. Something like that. Anyway, thanks for reading my little rant and sorry if it's a little bit of a poor me session. I didn't really mean to do that but I just needed some sort of outlet and I guess this was the chosen way.

Thanks again for reading,